Previously on The Biggest Loser Joe had a bit of a cry because nobody likes him and they keep trying to make him eat worms.

At least it was something like that. The only time Joe’s happy is when he’s messing with someone else’s life so…

We also saw some more footage from the trainers week long stay with their families. Included gratuitous underwear shots of Tiffiny and many dumpling-induced dry heaves from Shannan.

Tonight! The Super Contest begins. Or so the teasers have been saying.
And the prize for winning is priceless – the chance to bring someone back into the game!

But first there’s another one of those oh-so-useful Family Weigh-Ins. But with the teams currently being Red versus MishMash, how’s this going to work?

Yup. Two “families” weighing in today – The Challenors and The Others. Making this even more useless than usual.
But whichever team wins will get a prize. Hooray!

That prize? Dunno. Hayley won’t tell us, beyond it having something to do with the Super Contest.

Challenors will weigh in first.
First we’ve got to catch up with Damien and Greg!
Damien says it’s been a bit of a struggle on the outside, getting back into the swing of things back home.

Damien’s Current Weight: 202.2kg
Exactly the same weight as when he left.

Greg’s turn. He’s been “flogging himself”, he says.

Greg’s Current weight: 163.8kg
A loss of 4.1kg from the previous catch up. That’s a very good result for someone on the outside so he’s clearly got his shit together at last. Good to see!

Challenor Start: 693.4kg
Challenor Current: 610.2kg
Challenor Loss: 83.2kg
Challenor Percentage: 12%

Joe’s pretty happy with that and thinks they’re in with a chance.

3 Families Weigh-In Time!
They’ll need a combined total of 181.1kg to beat The Challenors. Crazy! They started at 1,508kg.

Time to catch up with Sarah-Jayne. The Duncan girls notice she’s losing her double chin and SJ is amazed by Emma’s losses so far. And says Jarrod becomes more handsome/ugly every day.

SJ Current: 107.2kg
So she’s lost 5.7kg in the past week, a nice rebound after her small gain last week.

SJ says it feels great to contribute so many kilos to hopefully beat those Challenor boys. She says it in good humour but The Challenors don’t look amused.

3 Families Start: 1,508kg
3 Families Current: 1,312.9kg
3 Families Loss: 195.1kg
3 Families Percentage: 12.94%

They’re all super excited when they realise they’re ahead.

Now they’ll also get to stack the odds in their favour at The Contest. They get to select their three champions to go up against the selected champion of The Challenors.
Kellie, Jarrod and Leigh are selected for the team of 3 Families, Joe for The Challenors as Nathaniel has a bung leg.

And this Contest’s prize is a big one. The winning team will get to select which of the eliminated contestants gets to return to the game!

Joe’s hoping for Damien to come back since he still needs to be there.
Duncans are hoping for Sarah-Jayne back.
Rebecca from The Moons says they’re “torn between two lovers, so to speak”. I’d imagine some of them would like to bring Damien back to make up for sending him home.

The trainers rock up the next day. Tiff, Shannan and Steve sit down with their 3 Families and find out the result of the group weigh-in. The trainers are all stoked by the result.
Shannan says the bad news then came in, with the Super Contest being on.

Steve and Shannan look a little nonplussed at the news of a potential returnee. Neither of them has lost anyone so far!
Tiffiny is very excited, hoping for her ninja Sarah-Jayne to come back.

Joe’s feeling stressed. He thinks he has to “carry” Nathaniel due to his injury. Mish says he’s not carrying him, they work as a team. Take the pressure off. You’ve got a job to do, get down and do it.

Mish decides the Red Team need a break from the humdrum life at Camp. So she’s taking them to the beach!

The 3 Families Team heads into one gym for training. Steve’s trying to get them to run around and around the gym in a certain direction, then change directions and they’re following directions very poorly.

Tiff gets the champs out the front for some intensive training. She leaps on Leigh’s back at one point and he says she may seem light but 55kg on your back is no joke!
Then Tiff gets Jarrod to do his fighting form like a champion. Then urges Leigh to do better and then Kellie, girlpower, do it loud! Etc.

Kellie’s going for a record on the treadmill, afterwards, at the urging of Shannan. Her previous best was 20 seconds at 12km/hr and today she’s aiming for 1min at 12.5km/hr.
She’s struggling a little, stumbling a bit but she keeps powering through.

Meanwhile The Challenors are at the beach. Michelle says they’re living 24/7 in a house where everyone wants them out so she needs to get them away from that.
First exercise is you have 2 minutes to dig as big a hole as you can with a shovel. Didn’t know you were allowed to do that on the beach? Dangerous, oooh!

Joe’s feeling a lot of pressure because he wants Damien back and he’s the only one that can make it happen.
Joe wants to be the one to bring him back, wants to show that he fought and brought him back.

Joe tells Michelle he doesn’t want to fail again. Last time he failed was in the last Contest. Which isn’t true, Nathaniel failed by holding the weight improperly!
Mish tells him that failing is pulling the pin and walking away. And he hasn’t done that yet.

Then it’s time for… The Contest!
Three challenges seem to be set up. A spinbike, a treadmill and… a piece of tape about 4 feet off the ground? Okay.

Hayley reminds everyone that the winner gets to bring someone back to the game. In case anyone has forgotten what they’ve all been thinking of every minute since it was announced.

The Super Contest will be best of three rounds. First round is a test of strength, second round is a test of knowledge and the third is a test of endurance.

Leigh’s stepping up for the Strength challenge, Jarrod for Knowledge and Kellie for Endurance? Interesting.

First round requires holding a 1kg dumbell at arm’s length and shoulder height. The first to drop their arms and break the tape is out.

Michelle thinks Joe can win, so long as he doesn’t let the pressure get to him.

Ready… steady… GO!

Leigh says this is really more of a battle of the mind than strength. It’s only 1kg but it’ll start to hurt after a while.

Joe’s “in the zone” but Leigh’s fidgeting around a bit.
They get to ten minutes and both are still going.

Shannan says Leigh has asked him why he’s lost his ability to be tough and so Shannan’s yelling out all the things to help him chase the demons away.

Twenty minutes and Joe’s talking a big game still. Says he can hold it as long as Leigh can and Leigh’s returning with a lot of Woo’s and Yeah’s!

Leigh’s arms are starting to touch the strip of tape more and more often at the 30 minute mark. Shannan tells us that Leigh needs to man up and lift the weight back up!

After an ad break Shannan is still urging Leigh on at the 33min mark. Leigh’s pressing down further and further on the tape and finally the tape snaps and Joe’s ecstatic.
First round win to Joe!

The Challenors need only win one more round, either the knowledge or the endurance.

Second round is the Treadmill of Knowledge. Epic loot, that!
The Champions will be on the treadmill and they need an assistant. Joe’s assistant will be Nathaniel, naturally.
Jarrod chooses… Craig? Because Craig won the last knowledge challenge. Craig insists he’s not knowledgeable at all.

The treadmills start at 5km/hr and for every wrong answer the speed will be increased by 1km/hr. Whoever stays on longest, wins.

Joe wants to beat Jarrod to have the upper hand over him. Jarrod wants to beat Joe because he can’t stand the guy.

Tiffiny says starting it on 5km/hr is walking for Jarrod. It’ll have to go past 13 for him to start sweating. Confidence!

Which of the following are our main source of fuel?
Carbohydrates, Protein or Fats?

Both say protein because both are idiots. The answer is, of course, carbs. Delicious carbs!

Carbs affect your blood glucose level?
True of False?

Both answer False, both are wrong again. Terrible.

Which contains the most fat?
100g of roast potatoes, 100g french fries or 100g of potato chips?

Both answer french fries and both are wrong, again. Potato chips have the most fat with 30g. Of 100g!

Jarrod’s still briskly walking at 8km/hr, Joe’s started a slow jog.

How much caffeine is the maximum recommended intake per day?
50, 200, 500mg?

200mg is, surprisingly, the right answer. And Nathaniel finally gets one right for his team. Craig answered 50mg which is what I would have thought as well.

What is the longest muscle in the human body?
Sartorius, gluteus maximus, quadriceps.

The gluteus maximus is your butt muscle, for anyone who didn’t know.
The answer is Sartorius and both boys have answered quadriceps.

Joe’s now on 9km/hr and Jarrod’s on 10.

How many steps per day does the average person take?
3-4000, 4-5000, 6-7000?

Craig gets it correct with 3-4000.

Hayley calls for Joe to increase his speed and… he doesn’t. Hayley insists. Joe delays more. Then taps out! Quitter! Could’ve stuck in there a bit longer methinks.

After an ad break, Jarrod says he was a little disappointed. He thought that Joe had more in him and Joe figured he couldn’t beat Jarrod and so he’d try and beat Kellie instead.
Joe’s pitching it as “being tactical” and saving his leg strength for the next step of the Contest. Which makes sense but… yeah.

But with the third round announcement it sounds like Joe may have made a very smart move.
The final test is a simple test of endurance. A bike race. The first contestant to clock up 10km on the spinbike will win.
Joe is, of course, an ex-cyclist. Of an elite level. Shannan says that Kellie’s just simply not a match for him, physically.

Kellie’s got some confidence out of the 24 hour challenge The Commando had set for them on the spinbike. So she thinks she’s a good chance.
Nathaniel’s a little concerned as he was beating Joe on the spinbikes the other day. He thinks maybe Joe should have stuck it out on the treadmill round.

Both hit the 2.3km mark around the same time.

Kellie’s picking up the pace and starts pedalling faster than Joe. She hits the 3.6km mark while Joe’s only at 3.5km!
Meg’s really happy, especially since Joe’s meant to be “this almighty cyclist” and yet Joe’s behind!

And she’s still in the lead at the 5km mark.
Mish is worried. She starts telling Joe to not hold back. Damien’s at the finish line, go go go! Then Nathaniel’s getting in Joe’s face and telling him this is for Damien, don’t you let him down.

6.5km each! 8.2km each!

Steve’s right beside Kellie and telling her to think of her family, keep pushing!

Joe’s down to the last kilometre and Kellie’s still powering away at about the same distance.

Lots of screaming from everyone. Tiff’s jumping up and down and screaming GO GO GOOOOO!

……………. TOMORROW NIGHT?! God damn it!
So, we find out who wins tomorrow night. Okay.

Also, the next challenge. It’s something to do with loading bottles onto a sled and dragging it across the grass and putting them in a big box. Looks like they’re all really enjoying themselves with that one.