TBL Australia 4×64: Eliminee Temptation plus Emazon makes a welcome return. There is a lie in this title, see if you can pick it.

Previously on The Biggest Loser, all the eliminated contestants returned to the House to fight for a spot back in the game!

Tonight, Emazon is back. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. She’s training the “final four” in some hobo hangout or something.
Also, Holly and Mel have made a decision that’s going to shock a lot of people.
And then in the next shot we see the remaining contestants lined up for the first challenge and there’s no sign of Holly and Mel.

I wonder if their big, shocking decision is that they’ve decided to head back home again?


Shannan and Michelle rock up to the house to find their black Losers sitting on the couch looking glum.
Everyone else is hiding in the trophy room and then they come running out after a minute or two. Yay! Hugs and excitement all round!

Shannan says Amanda and Stewart impressed him the most. They used to sabotage each other but that’s gone now.

Lots of other recapping about what’s been going on, all stuff we already knew.

None of the final four are saying much and Jodi says she doesn’t think any of them are happy to see the returning contestants.
No, really?

Shannan’s taking the final four for training today while Michelle takes everyone to the big gym.
Right after Mel and Holly have a little chat to Michelle!

They say it’s been good on the outside and they’re loving it outside. But now they’re back again they’re feeling down once more.
They tell Michelle they’re not going to be staying because their heads and hearts aren’t in it.
Michelle tells us that she’s disappointed they’ve not stuck with it and given it a go.
Erm, phooey to that Michelle. Look at them both, they’ve clearly kept up the loss on the outside and they’re both looking great. They don’t need to be there to finish their journey and they’d rather NOT be there. What’s the problem? It’s not the same as whiny bitches like Sarah and Steven, these two have put in the hard work and got what they needed out of the experience. Good for them!

Michelle says she can’t want it for them and Mel says there’s no point if they can’t give her 100% of themselves.
Michelle tells us she honestly wishes them all the best and she’s proud of what they’ve achieved so far.

Meaghan’s shocked Holly and Mel want to leave again. Not sure why everyone finds it so surprising!
Various hugs and kisses are dispensed and the girls get in a van to head off.

Michelle then has her big group in the big gym for a big training session. For some of them this is their first training session with Michelle so it could be interesting!
Tania looks the most nervous. Probably because it’s doubtful she’s done any training outside the house!

Michelle says this is about finding out how much work they’ve been doing on the outside.

Jodi “seen” this training session as a way to find out who’d she’d need to overtake and who’d be left behind.

Michelle tells the treadmillers to go to 16km/h. Amanda freaks out and instantly assumes she can’t do it. Though she says she’ll give it a go and she claims to us that she’s the sort who’ll give it a go now.
Yeah, putting your hands on the treadmill and freaking out while “running” is giving it a go.

Tania and Ramses are struggling too. Even Amanda’s going faster than Ramses on the cross-trainer.

Tania whines to Michelle that 10km/h is burning her feet. 10km/h! Much as I complained about Amanda wussing out on 16km/h, at least she was managing 13km/h without being a total sook! Ooooh, my feet hurt. That’s because you haven’t done fuck all training since you left!
Ugh.
Andrew says it’s fairly obvious from the way those two trainer today that they’ve not been doing any cardio at all on the outside.

Eventually all the jiggling and joggling gets too much for Tania and she scoots off out of the training session and looks for a convenient garden bed.
Yup, it’s puke time for Tania! This late in the game that’s ridiculous!
Michelle follows her out to make sure she’s not just skiving off but then she sees her puking up breakfast and Michelle thinks to herself, “Okay, my work here is done!”
But she goes over to Tania and calms her down and helps her get back into the gym eventually and back into the exercising.

And now it’s time for the eliminees first challenge.
And it looks like a kid’s party! Meaghan says it looks like the perfect kid’s party with jumping castles and presents on the table and so on.

Ajay, in a sort of maroon-y dress thing with two maroon-y flower-y things between her right boob and right shoulder, announces that it’s a Temptation!

There’ll be four spots up for grabs at a wildcard weigh in. The two contestants who have lost the most weight this week will win a place back in the competition.

Just one of the white t-shirts is available in today’s Temptation. But to have a chance at winning you’ve got to give in to Temptation!

On the table are six present boxes. They all look much the same on the outside, but on the inside they’re very different!

One present has something everyone will want – two tickets (cue shocked look from Amanda) for an eight day North Vietnam trek from Kumuka Travel, valued at $5,500. Not bad, if you want to go to Vietnam.
Another present has… a scooter in it! A Sym Scoota. From Scoota.com.au if you want to see them.
Sharif wasn’t really thinking he’d take part in Temptation, but once he found out there was actual prizes, he was a lot more tempted!

One present will take you back to your childhood – chocolate crackles!!! :-D
Meaghan hates them. :-(
Amanda says that if she has to eat something, she’d like to eat them. And doesn’t seem remorseful at all.

Inside another present – fairybread! :-D

One box has something nobody wants – a piece of paper with “GO HOME” written on it. Meaning you have to… go home!

And of course the last box has the coveted white t-shirt.

And yes, there’s only six boxes. So it’s first to touch a box, gets it! Yay fatty running race!

Most of them are quite confident of getting one of the boxes. More than 6 of them seem confident. It seems unlikely some of them can count!

Everyone bar Tania, Jeda and Sean go pelting down the field to try and claim a box.
And in the end Jodi, Meaghan, Stewart, Ben, Andrew and Sharif manage to claim a box.

But nobody yet knows who has what. Of course they’re not allowed to just pick them up and tear in, we have to wait for them to be painstakingly revealed over the remaining 20 minutes, probably?

Sharif gets the privilege of going first. And gets fairybread!
Apparently this is the first time Sharif’s had fairybread! Good lord, that’s a tragedy! :-(

Meaghan’s turn second. She sees a piece of paper under her box and then… it’s the Scooter paper! Yay!
She says she’d’ve liked to have the white shirt but a scooter is still pretty cool.

Andrew’s turn. He has… the chocolate crackles. He doesn’t look like a happy chappy.
He hates them at the best of times, he says.
5 of them. 961 calories. OUCH.
But he gets stuck in. He’s worried he might throw up when he gets to the third chocolate crackle. He says to everyone else that even when he was fat he wouldn’t’ve eaten them!

That leaves Ben, Stewart and Jodi with unopened boxes.
Jodi’s turn.
“When Ajay aksed me to, um, open my present, I touched my box and I didn’t know if I wanted to, um, open it or not. I was really scared.” I don’t know whether to laugh at her touching her box or cry at her bogantastic language skills.
I think I’ll go with crying though as her box contains the white shirt. Nooooo! One of the least deserving people gets a shirt, this system sucks!

Just Ben and Stewart left. One of them will be going home, one of them will be going to the ‘Nam!

Ben has to go first. He lifts the cover on his box and… it’s the Go Home one. :-(
He looks very disappointed, as you’d expect. But while he’s devastated he’s still okay with going home because he knows he can do it on the outside now.

That of course leaves Stewart with the Kumuka Travel tour to Vietnam!

Ben says his goodbyes and heads off in a van.
But he promises to be under 100kg and loving life when he arrives at the finale!

Jodi is now guaranteed a spot at the wildcard weigh-in. Woooooo…

Three white t-shirts remain. How they will be parceled out will be revealed in the coming days.

“I put everything on the line today but it definitely paid off. I didn’t go home and I didn’t have to eat Temptation and I got a shirt!” Shirts in short supply in the Land of Bogans?

Meanwhile the four Blacks are sitting in the lounge room waiting for everyone to come back and speculating on where the others had all gotten off to.
The eliminees file back in. Jodi says she thought she’d come in last and be sort of, “Surprise!”
And when someone notices her white shirt she looks very smug and says she’s their wildcard now.

And Ben’s gone. Sam says it was sad for them to see Ben go as they’d’ve been okay with him coming back and hanging around again!

Then they recount all the other prizes that were being handed out.
And Cam is unimpressed. He says to them that they got to go home to family and a holiday and get offered prizes and they’re still stuck there. “Great!”
Amanda shakes her head. Meaghan says she was angry with Cam because nobody on the couch wanted to go home.
Meaghan pulls him up and says he should be proud of himself for getting a spot and be happy!

The Black people go have a chat about people returning and whatnot.
Cam says that for ten weeks there’s been no prizes, other than the tuna challenge, then all the people come back and they get offered a bunch of prizes!
Julie tells him to turn his attitude around because they need to stay positive for the good of them all. When he has the negative attitude his weightloss plummets.

Julie’s still lecturing Cam when Sam sees a very nondescript black box sitting on the chest of drawers. The chest of drawers that is black. How long they were going to sit there and not notice could have been an interesting social experiment.
Anyway, inside the box is a note saying that there’s a car waiting for them downstairs to take the four of them off to receive a present.
But in the past when they’ve got such letters it’s usually been nothing like what they might expect, based on the words.
Then Cam’s getting a bit teary, thinking maybe they’re getting things after all. Tiffany calls him a wally for getting emotional again though.

Julie thinks maybe Cam was embarassed about his actions earlier.

After yet another ad break we get a black and white replay of what we saw right before the ad break.
I know the ad breaks are really fucking long these days but come on!

They head off to something that looks like some post-apocalyptic homeless shelter or something. Burning barrels, graffiti all over the walls, random old train carriages, also covered in graffiti.
Hey, this doesn’t look like somewhere Michelle, Shannan or The Commando would find suitable for training. Who do we know that thinks doing the same sort of training they do in the gym, but doing it in shitholes, is worthwhile?
Emazon!

But of course she can’t just walk in like a human. Oh no. She’s got to roll in with a big growly engined car.

Meanwhile Julie’s freaking out badly, despite the assurances from Cam and Sam and Tiffany that it will be okay.
Cam and Sam then hear Emazon tell them to step into the cage that’s conveniently located in the middle of the warehouse type thing and in perfect nick.

Emazon’s numberplate reads “NOTHIS”. Upon seeing it my Dad thought it must be “Not His”. I think it’s more likely a bogan corruption of “Know This”.
Either way, why would you get that on a numberplate?

Emazon says she wants to know how they feel about someone muscling in on their turf. They’re the final four! Is someone just going to come in and take that from them?!
Well, it’s not like they can just go beat them up in a straight fight.

But hey, let’s do some lame ass fight training again.

Same as what we’ve seen before. The usual jabs, straights, crosses and uppercuts. Mixed in with some weak grappling from Emazon trying to take them down. I assume she’s going easy on them due to the hard concrete floor.
Seems like this may have been a better training session on the grass. Or the beach. Or the parade ground when it’s full of soft, squishy mud!

Anyway…

Tiffany says three months ago if she’d been faced with a crazy lady looking to fight her, she might have been like Julie, crying and scared. She’d not discovered what she’s made of.
Tiffany tells us she hasn’t gone through 10.5 weeks of hell just to be pushed around by Emazon and she certainly won’t be pushed around by the eliminated contestants!

Julie’s last on purpose, Emazon says. Apparently the sort of person Julie is, she needs permission to do it. Seeing other people do it first gives her permission to do it. Or something. It’s all gibberish to me. Julie’s been doing boxing training with Shannan for weeks and weeks now. Including Shannan – a quite competent MALE boxer – throwing some punches back and expecting her to block them.
Seriously, why the hell is Julie freaking out over this? She should be over that by now!

Emazon leaves us with, “They’re up against a serious threat. And now, they’re ready. Now they’re prepared. Now they’re trained. Now they’re ready for game-on.”
Yes, I’m sure an hour or two with you is much more important than the last however many months with Shannan and Michelle. Buffoon.

Tomorrow night the “holding weights on your shoulders” challenge sees a return from last year!
But who’ll be the first to crack and face instant elimination? Find out tomorrow night!